Hide and Seek
by kelly.ftw
Summary: The unexpected happens and Bella does what she feels is best for Edward. All human.
1. Prologue

**A/N**: First Twilight fan fic. Be gentle, loves. Of course, I do not own the characters.

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_**Spin me around again,****  
and rub my eyes.  
This can't be happening.**_

_-Imogen Heap, Hide and Seek._

Prologue

I remember the night when Edward Cullen told me what he wanted to do with his life during the next ten years.

We were seventeen, lounging in our meadow, staring up at the stars. He was laying with his perfect face was cradled in my lap, and I was idly stroking his unique and beautiful bronze colored hair that I knew no one else on the Earth could have.

We had been sitting in comfortable silence for a while, listening to nothing but the insects singing away in the thick, green forest, and the light breeze causing the leaves to rustle lazily against one another.

"Edward?"

"Yes?"

Still looking up the stars I squinted my eyes, pondering. "What do you want to do with your life?"

I felt him shrug, and exhale. I looked down at him. "Everything," he said, chuckling lightly. "I want to go to the University of Washington to become a doctor, just like my dad. I want to travel. I want to study in a foreign country. I want to write music. I want to go to Africa and help the children there…"

I remember feeling very envious, but not surprised, as he continued his list of plans and aspirations. I had never really had strong ambitions like Edward, but I did have a strong feeling in my heart that I wanted to stand by his side while he did all of those things. I wanted to be there as his equal, making sure nothing came between him in his journey to accomplish those goals.

So a year later, at the tender age of eighteen, I looked down at the plastic indicator in my trembling hands. As my stomach churned slowly while the two pink lines formed, I knew there was only one thing I could do for Edward, for myself. What kind of person would I be if I let these two little lines disrupt his inspiring future?

I reached a clammy hand over to my cell phone, found the correct number, and put the phone up to my ear.

Each ring sounded longer, more drawn out somehow.

"Hello?" A familiar voice answered.

I took in a deep, shaky breath. "Mom?"

"Bella, honey, what is it?" I could just picture her putting down her latest romance novel and sitting straight up in her white wicker chair out on her screened-in porch.

I closed my eyes and a single teardrop fell over my pale cheek. "Mom, I'm coming home."


	2. Chapter 1

**A/N**: Please review and let me know what you like or don't like. I've gotten two reviews so far and I can't even tell you how excited I got when I read them.

Of course, I do not own the characters.

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_**Faces I wish I had memorized then.  
Love I failed to see comes softly again.  
**_-Rachel Harlow, Cherish Tonight

Chapter 1

Through my subconscious I knew I was dreaming.

I knew I was dreaming because Edward Cullen was with my son and I, and I had left Edward behind six years ago.

This wasn't the first time I've had this dream.

We were walking in the woods, most likely back in Forks. It was damp, as usual, and there was a thin layer of fog on the forest floor. I couldn't tell if it was sunny or not through the thick canopy above us.

My beautiful son, Jack, had his left hand clasped tightly around my right, and his right hand held in his father's left. I looked over at their joined hands and marveled at how similar they were. Their skin was the exact same pale ivory, and I knew Jack's fingers were going to grow to be able to play beautiful music, just like his father. I let my eyes travel along Jack's profile and already I could tell he was going to inherit his father's strong jaw and perfectly shaped nose. I saved his eyes for last, because that was the most shocking similarity. Jack had his father's striking emerald colored eyes. Sometimes, when I yelled at Jack for doing something wrong, his eyes would flash to mine, and my heart would sink. Those eyes, those gorgeous green eyes, held such a connection to my heart, and at times when I would look at him, I'd see Edward.

My son noticed that I was staring at him, and he lifted his head to look at me. I gave him a loving grin and he looked away sheepishly, and the blush began to flow into his cheeks. This is where my genes came in. Along with the blushing, his hair was dark brown and would sometimes have a red tint in the sunlight, just like myself.

Something caught Jack's eye and he let go of our hands and rushed forward. Edward and I followed him slowly, our hands lightly brushing against each other, the familiar spark flowing between us as always.

"Not too far ahead, Jack," I hollered, my voice echoing through the trees.

That was usually the part in the dream when Edward would grab my wrist and turn me toward him forcefully, the current running through my body like fire. I'd look up to his eyes, noticing they were a shade of dark green, the color his eyes would turn when I'd done something dangerous, something wrong.

"You shouldn't have kept him from me, Isabella," he said, his voice thick.

I knew I was in trouble when he used my full name.

He took a step towards me, looking at me from under the fringe of his eyelashes, and I took a step back.

"I was trying to protect you," I always answered.

"You shouldn't have kept him from me," he repeated, still walking towards me.

I continued walking backwards, stumbling a bit, until my back pressed against a tree. Quickly glancing behind me and seeing no escape, I let out a gasp and pushed the hair out of my face.

The beautiful man came closer to me still, until both his hands were pressed against the tree on either side of my head.

"I will never forgive you," he snarled, his sweet breath cascading across my face.

My eyes searched his. "Edward, I-"

"Momma, momma!"

My head snapped towards Jack's direction.

I felt a sudden weight on my midsection, knocking the air out of me. On instinct, my arms clenched around my stomach and I looked down, seeing nothing. I looked back up at Edward, and his beautiful face was fading.

"Edward!" I shouted, reaching towards him.

"Momma!"

_BEEP-BEEP-BEEP!_

My eyes fluttered open, and I saw Jack's smiling face looking down at me. He was sitting on my belly.

"Hi!" He greeted me.

I let out a gust of air and pushed my sweaty hair out of my face. "Hey, buddy."

"You're alarm's been going off for like ten minutes! Don'tcha remember what day it is?" He started bouncing on my stomach. "First day of school! First day of school!"

Ha! Yeah, give school a couple more years and soon I'll be the one dragging your butt out of bed, I thought. I smiled up at him and tickled his sides. "Alright, alright, stop bouncing on me. Mommy has to go to the bathroom." Jack turned into a fit of giggles and fell over onto the bed, lying next to me, his body encased in my fluffy white comforter. I turned on my side to face him. We stared at each other, our noses almost touching.

His green eyes were wide and bright with excitement and I wondered how long he'd been awake.

"Momma, were you having a nightmare?"

I closed my eyes for a second. I would never consider any dream about Edward as a nightmare. Ever. "No, baby. I just got sort of nervous at the end of the dream."

His small hand reached over and he poked my forehead. "You're all sweaty."

"I know. Did grandma make breakfast for you?" I asked, deciding to change the conversation before he asked me what the dream was about.

He nodded. "Uh huh. She made me oatmeal."

I kissed his forehead. "That sounds good." I stretched. "Why don't you go change out of your pajamas and brush your teeth."

"Okay!" And with that, he flew out of my room.

I stared at the ceiling for a couple minutes wondering where there the time went. It seemed like just yesterday I had arrived in Chicago…

_With my arms clenched tight around my stomach, I dragged my feet to the baggage claim with a puffy face and a heavy heart. I don't think I stopped crying once on the flight, much to the concern of the flight attendants and the people sitting around me._

_My heart was telling me I'd made an awful mistake. "You should have told Edward, you idiot! You two should be together right now!" My mind, on the other hand, had other ideas. "Edward wants to do so many things with his life. You should not let a child interfere with that and let him live freely, as if you'd never existed."_

_My stomach convulsed as the last thought echoed in my mind. "As if you'd never existed."_

_But my heart and mind were both in agreement on one thing: I would not give up Edward's baby._

_I had the hood of my brown zip-up hoodie pulled up over my head as I stood motionless, watching the bags circle around the carousel. One by one they started to disappear and the people around me began dispersing._

_I hadn't noticed someone was calling my name until they touched my shoulder._

_"Bella, honey, Phil grabbed your bag. Let's go home." I felt my mom put her arm around my shoulder._

_In a zombie like trance, I let her lead me out to the car…_

"Bella! You've got to take Jack to school then meet me at the bookstore. Time to get a move on, sweetie!"

Ahh, the joys of still living with your mother.

I groaned, silently cursed at her, then immediately took it back. Renee has been nothing but supportive of me over these past six years, and if it weren't for her and nurturing personality, I honestly don't know what I would have done.

Eventually, I heaved myself out of bed and walked slowly to my bathroom. I gazed at myself in the mirror, rubbing my hands over my face, my body still a little shaken up over the dream. "Relax, Bella," I told my reflection.

I took a quick shower, letting the hot water soothe my nerves. After towel drying my hair, I haphazardly ran a brush through the tangled mess. I shook my head and ran my fingers through it and decided to let it air dry. Realizing I was running short on time, I threw on a pair of jeans and a loose t-shirt, intending to come back here after dropping Jack off to change for work.

I collided with Jack as he shot out of his bedroom, a toy dinosaur in his hand. I ruffled his hair. "Whoa, where's the fire?" I took in his disheveled appearance and his untied shoelaces. I crouched down. "Still have to work on tying these shoes, I see," I said as I swiftly tied his sneakers and straightened out his shirt.

He pursed his lips and his brow furrowed in frustration. "I can almost do it, but it just never stays."

"Don't worry, we'll practice when you come home." I kissed him on the cheek.

After stuffing his lunchbox into his backpack, I grabbed my purse and car keys, heading downstairs to the garage.

"I'll see you later, mom!" I shouted over my shoulder.

"Bye grandma!" Jack yelled, slinging his big Transformers backpack over his shoulder.

Our eyes locked and we paused, waiting for her response.

"I'm not old enough to be called grandma!"

We smiled at each other knowingly. This has always been her reaction. Once Renee came to the realization that she would be a grandmother, she about had a stroke.

I made sure Jack buckled himself up in the backseat of my little silver Toyota Corolla and began the short ride to the school. After a few blocks, I peered at Jack in the rear-view mirror. "Do you remember your teachers name?" I asked.

He shook his head. "Nuh-uh." He was busy making his T-Rex fight this raptor.

Keeping my eyes on the road, I reached over into my purse and pulled out the information sheet that included his room number, lunch hour, and teacher's name, plus other general information. "Okay, her name is Mrs. Whitlock, Jack, in room 1E. Remember that in case you get lost or something."

He scoffed and rolled his bright, green eyes. "Jeez mom, I'm not a kindergartener anymore. I can remember someone's name."

I smiled, inwardly cracking up at his "grown-up" attitude. I tried to ignore the sinking feeling when I remember his father making that exact same face at me years ago.


	3. Chapter 2

**A/N**: I'm so excited to look at my inbox and see new story alert notifications! Please review, I'm reading them all.

As I've said in my profile, this story will be mainly Bella's POV, but I will tuck some other short POV's in there. If the POV is not specified, assume it is Bella.

I don't have an updating schedule. Right now the chapters are coming rather quickly, but the holidays are approaching and I don't know how much that will affect my updates.

Of course, I do not own the characters.

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_**All that I know is I'm breathing.  
All I can do is keep breathing.  
All we can do is keep breathing  
now.**  
-Ingrid Michaelson, Keep Breathing_

Chapter Two

I parked on the curb in front of the school and helped Jack out of the car. We were running a bit late, thanks to his wonderful mother who, at twenty-three years old, is still too slow to get out of bed. After I grabbed his bag, I took his hand and we walked into the front doors. Once we stepped inside, I felt Jack hold my hand just a little bit tighter. I surreptitiously glanced down at him and saw that his eyes were wide, taking everything in. There were bright motivational posters along the walls, lines of hooks filled with backpacks, and students and parents were crowding the halls. I gave his hand a small squeeze of reassurance.

We walked a short distance down the western corridor and found his classroom. I peeked inside the room and spotted the back of the teacher who I assumed was Mrs. Whitlock. The name sounded so prim and proper that I was expecting a grandmother figure, but I was shocked to see that she was actually very young. My age, or close to it. Her hair was long and very dark brown, if not black. She was incredibly slim as well. There was something in the way she carried herself that seemed familiar.

I pulled Jack to the side of the door in the hallway and crouched down to be at his level. "Alright, bud. Your first day of first grade. Are you ready?"

He hooked his thumbs into the straps of his backpack and nodded. "Yeah."

I smiled at him. "Do you think you can last a whole day without your ol' lady?" I asked playfully.

As I predicted, he blushed. "Gosh mom, you're not old."

"Good answer, sweetheart," I said chuckling, ruffling his soft hair.

That's when I noticed he glanced a little nervously around him at all the other kids his age. "Hey, look at me." I put my hands on his cheeks. "Don't be nervous, baby."

"I just hope the other kids will like me," he said quietly, shuffling his feet a little bit.

"They'd be fools not to like you, Jack," I told him firmly. "You just be your usual proper, charming self. And if anyone gives you a hard time, make sure you tell Mrs. Whitlock right away. That's she's there for. I'll be back right here in this spot to pick you up at 2:30," I said pointing at the ground. "And if it's not me, then it'll be gram. Okay?"

"Okay, momma."

I pulled him close to me and he wrapped his arms around my neck. "Your T-Rex and raptor are in your backpack," I whispered in his ear. "I'm sure the other boys would love it if you asked them to play dinosaurs with you." I gave him a big, theatrical sloppy kiss on the cheek.

He giggled, pulling away, wiping away all evidence of my kiss. "Ugh, cooties, mom!"

I stood laughing. "Don't worry, kid, I got my cootie shot a long time ago."

His eyes widened. "Where can I get one of those?" He asked eagerly.

I rolled my eyes, still smiling. "I'm sure someone in your class can show you. Now scoot," I said, noticing the halls were emptying. "I love you."

"Love you too, mom," he called over his shoulder as he walked into class.

I watched him for a minute or two after that. He found his desk and sat down, immediately pulling out his T-Rex. I saw a boy start talking to him and they were clearly agreeing on how cool tyrannosaurus rex's were. I turned and slowly walked back out to my car, listening to Mrs. Whitlock's young, high-pitched voice calling the class to order.

"My name is Mrs. Whitlock, but you all can call me Miss Alice."

My steps faltered a bit as I heard that name. Alice. That was the name of Edward Cullen's twin sister, also known as my best girlfriend from Forks.

Of course, that couldn't be her, though. Alice was always adamant about keeping her hair very short. Besides, what would she be doing in Chicago? I shrugged the thought off and walked back out to my car and headed home to change.

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**Alice POV**

I sat on a stool in the front of the classroom and my eyes roamed over my new students.

_My_ classroom. With _my _new students.

This was my first year teaching on my own. My stomach was in knots, but I quickly tried to push my nervousness to the back of my head. I had a job to do, and that was currently to make everyone feel safe and calm. I was naturally a hyper person, so I secretly wished that my cool and collected husband Jasper was here to help calm the atmosphere.

"My name is Mrs. Whitlock," I said over the hum of their voices, and my students stopped talking and turned their attention to me. "But you all can call me Miss Alice."

"Hello, Miss Alice," the responded, to my delight. My heart burst with pride.

"Why don't we all play a getting-to-know-you game? Everyone stand up and come to the front of the room."

There was an immediate swirl of action, all of them coming up at once, a blur of color and excitement. One boy in such a hurry tripped over his shoelaces and fell right into me, his hands clutching the sides of my black blouse.

"Oh! Are you okay, sweetie?" I asked in my sing-song voice, crouching down in front of him.

His bright eyes looked up to mine, and I'm pretty sure my heart stopped dead in my chest.

"Yes, sorry," he mumbled as his cheeks flushed with embarrassment.

It took me a minute to compose myself and remember where I was. Was I looking at Edward's reflection as a six-year-old? His face. His eyes. My brother's eyes were one of a kind, or so I'd thought, but this boy's eyes were precisely the same shade of emerald.

"Are you okay, Miss Alice?" The boy asked me uncertainly.

I can't imagine what my face must have looked like, because he appeared very scared, like he'd done something wrong. I shook my head, forcing my shocked expression off of my face and slowly smiled, willing my heart to start beating.

"I'm fine, thank you," I responded while reaching my trembling fingers down to tie his shoes. "What's your name?"

"My name's Jack. Jack Swan."

_Jack Swan._ The last name echoed in my head then lodged down my throat, causing me to choke and cough. I saw Jack jerk away from me.

I covered my mouth and recovered, clearing my throat. "I'm sorry, Jack. I seem to be having a rough morning. It's nice to meet you. Are you ready to play our game?"

He looked down at his tied shoes, then back up to me, smiling a crooked smile. "Uh huh."

Oh, God.

I watched him run back into the large group of students that were conversing and wiggling with excitement, waiting for the game to start.

"Okay," I hollered, my voice a bit shaky. "The first part of our game is about your birthdays. Each part of the wall has a poster with a month on it." I paused, letting their eyes search the walls. "On the count of three, _carefully_ run to the poster of the month you were born. Ready?" I kept my eye on Jack. "One, two, three!"

Jack took off for the north wall and stood underneath the month of April. I mentally did some math. Counting backwards nine months from April, I came up with July. Bella left Forks in August, right before Senior year started.

Alright, alright, calm down. Don't jump to conclusions, I told myself. This could just be a huge coincidence. I knew I could figure this out once my class left for lunch. I'd just have to look up Jack's file and see his parents listed.

We continued more of our game and the rest of the morning passed without incident. I tried to push thoughts of Bella Swan out of my head, but every time my eyes met Jack's my heart would stop again.

At noon, I lined the class up and walked them down to the lunchroom. Once they were inside, I hustled to the main office.

"Mrs. Whitlock, what's the hurry?" Mrs. Cope asked me.

I steadied my breathing and smiled at her. "Sorry, Mrs. Cope. I just needed to get a student's file before their lunch and recess break is over."

"Is there a problem?"

Ah, crap. I needed a reason to get to the file. "Um, well, I wanted to send a note home with a student to a parent and I just needed to know the parent's name."

She chuckled darkly and turned to a locked filing cabinet. "First day of school and you already have to send a note home? Good luck, Mrs. Whitlock."

I fiddled with my fingers. "Right, I know, looks like it may be a tough year, " I said, not necessarily disagreeing with her. "His name is Jack Swan."

Mrs. Cope rummaged through the files for a minute until she found it. "Here you go. Unfortunately, you can't take it out of the office," she said.

"That's okay, I just need a name." I opened the manila folder and there it was, the answer staring at me in the face on the first page.

IN CASE OF EMERGENCY CONTACT:  
1. Isabella Swan - Relationship: Mother  
2. Renee Dwyer – Relationship: Grandmother

I don't know how much time passed as I stared at those two names, but I was forced back into reality when Mrs. Cope rested her hand on mine.

"Oh dear, you look like you've seen a ghost. Is the situation with Jack more serious than you're letting on?"

"N-No, I just started spacing out. Sorry." I closed the folder, my hands now visibly shaking. "Thank you," I whispered, my voice suddenly unable to make it out of my thickening throat.

Mrs. Cope slowly took the file from me. "The first day can be very stressful," she stated trying to comfort me.

I waved her off. "I'm fine. And, please, call me Alice." I turned and slowly walked back to my classroom, my fingers massaging my temples.

Bella, what have you _done_?

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**A/N**: Do you remember your first grade teacher's name?


	4. Chapter 3

**A/N**: So sorry for the delay. Work has been busy, as life has been in general. To make it up to you, I made this chapter a bit longer. Happy Holidays everyone.

Ho hum. I got Bella's present age wrong. She was eighteen in August of 2003 when she left Edward, but we all know that her birthday is in September, so she turned nineteen the month after she left. In the story it is August of 2009 making her twenty-four, going on twenty-five. Thankfully, no one really noticed (or, at least, no one mentioned it).

My first grade teacher was Mrs. Truesdale, and I loved her. I gave her a cookbook for Christmas.

Your lovely reviews are making me smile. Thank you. :3

Of course, I don't own the characters.

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_**Don't let them see you cry.  
Breathe while you're alive.**  
-Manchester Orchestra, Don't Let Them See You Cry  
_

Chapter Three

I got home after dropping Jack off and dressed for the day in dark wash skinny jeans and a white short sleeved button-up blouse, then quickly attempted to make my now frizzy hair look somewhat presentable. Chicago's humidity made my hair a complete mess. I could straighten it as much as I wanted, but the moment I stepped outside, my hair would frizz uncontrollably. Keeping that in mind, I decided to tie it into a ponytail. After applying a few swipes of mascara, light blush, and lip-gloss, I slipped on some strappy gold sandals and headed out the door.

My mom opened a small used bookstore on Lincoln Avenue to keep herself busy while Phil traveled. She named the store Serenity. It was incredibly cozy, with dark wood floors that were mostly covered by different kinds of oriental rugs and walls that were painted a deep red. Many small mahogany bookshelves overflowing with books lined the main floor and there was a small seating area on the east side of the store. A small children's section was tucked into the back corner, which, along with books, had a small table with four tiny chairs and fun things to do like puzzles, coloring books, and building blocks.

When I moved back to Chicago, I started working there almost immediately as a cashier, and it was actually pretty perfect. While my belly was growing, I got to read pregnancy and parenting books for free, and since we weren't incredibly busy, I didn't spend too much time on my feet and my hours were extremely flexible.

The store has been busy enough to keep us afloat, but business definitely hasn't been booming. And though this sounds awful, the economic downfall has helped our business tremendously making this past year our most successful.

The bookstore has been our home away from home. Jack basically grew up here. Being the daughter of the owner, I got to bring him to work. When he was just a baby, he would sit in his bouncy chair and watch me work with his big green eyes and his "oo" face. When he could walk, I'd put up a little gate in the corner of the children's area and he would play in there. He still plays in there today but with his own toys instead. Over the past year he's been starting to enjoy reading some of the books. One of his favorites is Where the Wild Things Are.

Of course, Serenity was located right next to Newton's, a sporting goods store that was also family owned. And as usual, Mike Newton was hanging out in the alley by the back entrance of his store, conveniently right where I parked.

"Bella!" He exclaimed as I slid out of my car.

I rolled my eyes on the inside and plastered a fake smile on my face. "Hey, Mike. How's it going?"

"Oh you know, same old!" He said, bobbing his head. Whenever he spoke to me, he was very loud and wound up. "How's Jacky boy?"

My smile turned genuine. Talking about Jack made me happy. He was my pride and joy. "Great, actually. Started his first day of first grade today." I moved to the back of my car and popped the trunk, grabbing a box filled with books from it.

"First grade! Wow, that's great! We should go out and celebrate. Have you tried out Clark's Bar yet? I hear they have really good beers on tap and–"

I shifted the weight of the box to my left hip and closed my trunk, cutting him off. "Hey, that's really thoughtful of you, but since school has started, parents are coming into the store to get books for required reading lists so things have been really busy," I said, rambling off a blatant lie.

"Come on, Bells, I know we'd –" He took a sudden step closer to me, taking me by surprise. I jerked, and the box slipped from my hands, right onto Mike's toe.

"OW!"

"Oh! Oh, Mike, I'm so sorry!" I bent down to lift the box. "Are you okay? Do you need an ice pack or anything?"

"It's cool, it's cool, I'm fine," he said, holding his foot and hopping around.

I stifled a laugh. "Um, well I'll see you later," I said, scooting past him to the back entrance of the store.

"Yeah, yeah, later."

I plopped the box down in the back office.

"That boy is never going to give up," my mom said, leaning in the doorway.

I groaned. "Am I not obvious enough? He's asked me out at least fifteen times and every time I've made up some lame excuse."

"Well, maybe you should go out with him once, just to get him off your back."

I turned away from her and opened the box, taking a few books out. "Mom, don't start this again."

She put her hands up signaling surrender. "I'm just saying you should go out with a man. You're still young, Bella. And Mike loves Jack."

"Who cares? Jack thinks he's as weird as I do," I argued.

"Phil and I worry about you, honey."

I slammed some books on the desk and whirled around to face her. "I've never needed a man to take care of myself."

She threw her hands up in the air. "Why do you always get so defensive when I suggest you date someone?"

Because the thought of being with anyone other than Edward sickens me, I thought.

She took a step towards me. "Bella, it's been seven years –"

"Two," I corrected quietly. "I did go out with Tyler Crowley once a couple years back."

"Once," she repeated, enunciating the important word of the sentence.

"Mom, since Jack, I've never had any desire to date anyone. You know this. This is not news."

"What are you waiting for, Isabella? Jack needs a father –"

"Oh, and Mike Newton is father material? Please, mother, he's still a boy for God's sake."

We stared at each other for a few beats and she crossed her arms. "You haven't gone back to him yet, Isabella. It doesn't look like you're ever going to," she said softly.

I didn't have to guess who she was talking about. I closed my eyes. "I would give anything to be able to go back to Edward," I said through my teeth. "But I can't. What I've done is unforgivable."

She walked close to me and put her hands on my shoulders, her eyes searching mine. "How do you know, Bella? How do you know Edward won't forgive you?"

I shook my head, feeling my throat close up. This was a difficult subject. "I don't know if Jack would forgive me, either," I whispered.

My mother gathered me in her arms and hugged me tightly. "We both know that what you did at the time was right. Charlie wouldn't know what to do with a pregnant teenager in his house, and I shudder to think what the people of Fork's would have said about you. And as for Edward…" She paused. "Be scared, be nervous, but don't let fear get in the way of doing the right thing."

"Hi Bella!"

We both turned towards the door to see Angela standing there.

"Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt," she said, starting to back away.

My mom and I shook our heads. "Don't worry about it," I said. "We were just finishing up here. Hey Ang, how about you help me sort and price these books then put them on the shelves?"

Angela was my best friend in Chicago. We met shortly after I moved to Chicago. She had been looking for a part-time job while she went to school at DePaul University. My mom hired her right way, and the two of us hit it off. She didn't know I was pregnant and when I started showing, she never asked any questions. I'll never forget what she told me when she caught me crying in the bathroom…

_I closed the door to the bathroom and heaved a sigh. My swollen ankles ached, my back was throbbing, and my emotions were running high. I lowered the lid on the toilet, put my head in my hands, and the tears began to fall._

_ I really did try my hardest not to cry. After all, this whole situation was my fault. The emptiness in my chest was my doing. I chose to leave Edward. I chose to change my cell phone number. I chose to tell Charlie to lie to Edward, to tell him that I couldn't stand being in Forks for another day, that if I put down any more roots there I would end up trapped, like my mother once felt._

_ I was grabbing a wad of toilet paper when I heard the door click open._

_ Damnit, I forgot to lock it._

_ "Oh! Sorry, Bella, the door wasn't locked and I just assumed –" She broke off her sentence as she realized my state._

_ I looked down from her face to my hands, not bothering to move for her. I thought she would leave, but I was surprised when I heard her close the door and move to crouch in front of me._

_ She placed her hands on top of mine. "I don't know you very well, or why you came here, or your whole situation in general," she started. "But I do know that you'll make a terrific mother. And Bella, if God brought you to it, He will bring you through it."_

_ When she said that, I immediately felt extremely guilty. Throughout the past seven months I'd been doing nothing but blaming God. Thanks a lot, God, for letting me become a statistic. Everyone told me that God has a plan. Great plan, God. Really._

_ But after really absorbing what she said, I realized that this wasn't God's doing. Condoms are not 100% effective, and I'd been taught that by my mother and sex education since I had become a teenager. What happened with Edward and I could have happened to anybody. It became abundantly clear to me that in my plan, I was supposed to be carrying this child._

_ But was I supposed to be doing this without Edward?_

"Well, I'm going to go up front," my mother said, breaking me out of my flashback. She left the office, but not before giving me a sympathetic smile.

Angela and I got to work and the rest of my short day passed quickly. Around 2:45, I said goodbye to Renee and Angela and headed out to go pick up Jack.

The school was swarming with children and parents. There wasn't a spot along the curb, so I pulled into the parking lot.

I entered the building and wove my way through the masses of teachers, parents, and students. Jack was leaning against the wall in the exact spot I told him to meet me. He was looking down at a white enveloped with a confused look on his face.

"Jack!" I called.

His head shot up he looked in my direction. He gave me a big toothy grin. "Mom!" He shouted, then ran over to hug me.

I smiled broadly. "Hey, sweetheart!" I squeezed him tight to me. "How was your day?"

"It was really fun! I like my teacher. She's real nice. I showed her my dinosaurs. And we talked about Transformers, too!"

"Sounds like you had a busy day! Are your classmates nice?"

"Uh huh. 'Cept this one girl. She kept pulling at my hair."

I tried not to grin. I had trouble keeping my fingers out of his hair myself. "Well just tell her to stop, and if she doesn't, make sure you tell Mrs. Whitlock."

"We're s'posed to call her Miss Alice," he said, taking my hand. We began walking out of the school to my car.

"What's that envelope for, Jack?" I asked as we approached my Toyota.

His brows came together in confusion, and he looked at the envelope. "I dunno. She told me it was for you. I hope I'm not in trouble."

I stopped short. "Jackson Edward Swan. Did you say those words that Gran sometimes says that I specifically told you not to repeat?" I asked, raising my voice.

His eyes grew wide. "No, momma, honest!" He shoved the envelope in my hand.

"If that's what this letter is about, you're not allowed to come into my bed at night for a week, no matter how scared you get. And I know you hate sleeping with Gran and Phil."

His lower lip started to tremble and those green eyes began to water, looking incredibly pitiful.

_Oh, Edward._

I sighed. His eyes were going to be a problem. I crouched down in front of him, sweeping his silent tears off of his cheeks. "I'm sorry, baby, I didn't mean to scare you. Here, let's see what this letter is about."

Jack chewed on his lower lip as I tore open the envelope and unfolded the small letter inside swiftly.

Bella-

_ Please meet me at the Starbuck's across the street from Jack's school at 8pm tonight. It seems you have a lot of explaining to do._

_-Alice Cullen_

_

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_

**A/N**: What was/is your favorite children's book?


	5. Chapter 4

**A/N:** I am awful! I lost my creative flow completely, but I've been thinking about this story a lot lately, so here is a new chapter. Sorry, my dears! My favorite children's book is The Three Little Kittens. My mom used to read it to me and she read it so perfectly, the story just stuck in my head. I also really like Where the Wild Things Are, just like Jack. Enjoy, and please review (even if it is just to yell at me for not updating sooner)!

There is some bad language in this chapter.

Of course, I don't own the characters.

* * *

_**And if you come around again,  
**__**then I will take  
the chain from off the door.**  
-Ingrid Michaelson, The Chain_

Chapter Four

Previously…

_Bella-_

_Please meet me at the Starbuck's across the street from Jack's school at 8pm tonight. It seems you have a lot of explaining to do._

_-Alice Cullen_

I felt the blood drain from my face and my stomach sink down to my knees. Holy shit. Alice is Jack's teacher. Holy shit. Holy shit! What if she tells Edward? Did she say anything to Jack? My hands involuntarily started to shake and I felt my breaths becoming shorter. No, Bella, do not have a panic attack in front of your son! I never had panic attacks until I moved away from Forks. I raised my left hand to my chest and felt my heart beating a million times a minute. Fuck, fuck, fuck. I slid down against the side of my car and sat on the pavement, bending my knees and spreading them slightly, hanging my head between them. Breathe in, breathe out…

I heard Jack open the car door, rummage around inside, then close it. I felt something cold touch my shoulder.

Jack had seen me like this before. I graciously took the water bottle from him and took a large gulp, focusing on the cool water traveling down my throat. Jack sat down next to me and put his head on my shoulder.

We sat like that for a few minutes, until the ringing in my ears began to fade and my heart had slowed to a natural pace. We were silent, listening to the sound of excited children and birds chirping.

"So I guess the letter is really bad, huh?" Jack asked.

I lifted my head, rested it on the side of the car, and let out a breath of air. "No, it's not bad, really. It just took me by surprise. It seems that your teacher and I know each other. I met her when I lived with Grandpa Charlie."

"Oh."

Silence followed again.

I got up to my feet. "Alright bud, let's go to the bookstore."

He hopped up and tossed his backpack into the backseat, then climbed inside, buckling himself in.

As I pulled away from the school I was still really unsettled. I wanted to go in there right now and see her, but I needed time to prepare myself. Apparently I only had a few hours. She has to be so pissed, which I should expect. I've been meaning to go back to Forks and tell Edward everything, but can it ever be too late to explain, or even to apologize? Now Alice is here, and God knows she can't keep her mouth shut.

I really didn't want _him_ to find out this way.

Now that Jack is in school full time, he's going to start asking where his dad is. And while I've anticipated the conversation, I honestly don't know what I'd tell him. I couldn't possibly explain why I left and expect Jack to understand.

I pulled into the alley and parked in the back and 'lo and behold, there was Mike Newton, waving at us like a madman with a big open mouth smile on his face.

"I do not want to deal with him right now," I muttered, frustrated and worried.

"Me neither," Jack piped up from the backseat.

I shot a glance at him through the rearview mirror. "Be nice, Jack."

"But he's probably going to grab my nose again!"

I sighed. "Yeah, probably."

We climbed out of the car and I went to Jack's side and put a protective hand on his shoulder.

"Hey, Jacky boy! How was your first day of school, buddy?"

Jack leaned into my side. "It was good."

"Did you do anything fun? Did you play lots of games? Oh! Watch this!" Mike gently pinched Jack's nose and let out a booming laugh. "Got your nose!"

Jack scrunched his face, giving Mike a nasty look, and rubbed his nose.

"Alright, Mike, that's enough." I said, guiding Jack to the back door.

"Aw, I was just playing him, Bells! Hey Jack, I'll give you your nose back if you convince your mom to have dinner with me!"

I felt my cheeks redden and I swear my blood pressure shot up fifty points. I shoved Jack inside and slammed the door. "Alright listen up, Newton. You're being fucking weird. Calm down, and stop acting so spastic. I am not going to go out with you because you give Jack the creeps and you are just so," I paused, trying to find the word. "Hyper! You're nice, don't get me wrong, okay? But you've got to relax and quit trying so hard!" I turned on my heel and headed to the door leaving Mike there, gaping like a fish. My mom and Jack were watching me through the door window.

I opened the door and stepped into the cool air conditioning, slamming it behind me.

"Isabella, that wasn't very nice," my mother said halfheartedly.

I glanced down at Jack who was looking up at me with wide eyes. It's very rare when I lose my temper. "Jack, go play."

He ran off immediately.

"Mom, take a look at this." I took the note from Alice out of my pocket and gave it to her.

Her eyes scanned over it then widened in shock. Her hand came up to cover her gaping mouth. "Holy shit," she whispered.

"Yeah, that's what I said." I walked into the office and plopped down in the desk chair.

She followed me and closed the door. "You have to go."

I nodded. "I know."

"What are you going to tell her?" She asked, sitting perched on the desk.

I took out my ponytail and ran my fingers through my hair, shaking it loose and letting it fall around my face. "The truth, I guess."

"God, do you think she told Edward anything?"

I closed my eyes and shook my head. "I really, really hope not. He shouldn't find out through Alice. He should find out through me."

"I wonder what she's doing in Chicago," my mom thought aloud.

"Maybe this was the only place she could find a job? It's a miracle she got a job at all in this economy."

"Yes, but those Cullen's were all very smart."

I nodded in agreement and my knees started bobbing up and down. "I fucked up, mom."

She rolled her eyes and walked over to me, crouching down. "Bella, people don't make decisions because they're easy, or because they're cheap or popular, but because they're right." She cupped my cheek in her hand. "Don't forget that."

"I don't have a clue of what to tell Jack," I whispered, my throat thick.

"Hey, first thing is first. Don't worry about that until you have to…"

_My breathing was quick and unsteady and I kept trying to sit up. "Mom, I don't know if I can do this. I'm going to be a horrible mother. What if he doesn't even like me?"_

_Renee was dressed in green scrubs, holding my hand and pushing my shoulder so I'd lie down. "Sit still, baby. It's a little late for that kind of talk. And first thing is first, Bella. Don't worry about him not liking you until you have to. Now breathe just like we practiced. You can do this."_

_I nodded and looked around the room seeing nothing but monitors, needles, and doom._

"_Okay, Bella, you're about to have another contraction," the nurse told me. "Just try to breathe through it."_

_I closed my eyes. Fuck contractions! I thought. I wish Edward was here. If I could just look up from this hospital bed and see his crooked smile and his beautiful, excited, but steady green eyes, I know I'd get through this. I'd reach up and run my fingers through his thick, unruly hair and tell him I love him. Then he'd stroke my cheek with his cool fingers and give me a soft, lingering kiss, distracting me from the pain. I smiled and chuckled softly. Only Edward Cullen's kiss could take away from the pain of a contraction like a drug._

_Ugh, I'm such an idiot. Why am I doing this alone? Edward, Edward, I'm so sorry!_

"_Bella?"_

_I opened my eyes and looked at my mother._

"_It's time for you to push," the doctor said, placing my feet in the stirrups._

_I quickly looked up at my mom and tears began to form in my eyes._

_Renee looked at me sternly. "No crying. You are strong, Isabella. Close your eyes, concentrate on breathing, and push when they tell you to."_

"_Okay," I said nodding, blowing out some air. "Okay." I closed my eyes._

"_You can do this, Bella," I imagined Edward saying to me, his smooth, peaceful voice close to my ear. "I love you."_

"_Push!"_

_One, two, three, four…_

_I imagined Edward holding my hand, his fingers smoothing my sweaty hair away from my face._

"_Good job, Bella! Another one just like that for me."_

_One, two, three, four…_

_Edward would be focusing only on me. He'd hum my lullaby for me, making my nerves calm and my body relax. He'd tell me how beautiful I was, how perfect I was, and though I wouldn't believe him, it'd still be nice to hear._

"_We can see the head, Bella. Two more big pushes should get his head out. Push again, Bella."_

_One, two, three, four…_

_I love you, Edward. I love you. I love you._

"_The head is out!"_

"_Oh, Bella, he already has so much hair!" I heard my mother tearfully say._

"_A couple more big pushes, Bella!"_

_So I pushed, and pushed again, imagining Edward being with me the whole time. God, I'm pathetic, I'm pathetic, I'm pathetic._

_And then, suddenly, the pressure was gone. And there was crying._

_Whimpering and completely out of breath, my teary eyes popped open and immediately focused on him, my son. My vision of Edward vanished in my mind like smoke. It was like no one else existed except for Jack and I._

_I love him. Jackson Edward Swan. I love him._

"_Give him to me," I croaked out. My throat was so dry, unlike the rest of me. I was sweating through the mattress, surely._

_The screaming bundle of flesh and bones was handed to me for just a moment, but as I gently cradled him in my arms, he stopped squirming and screaming, just for those few seconds._

_I smiled wistfully at my mother. "He likes me," I said as they took him away to clean him off._

_She nodded, wiping happy tears away from her eyes. "He likes you."_

"Why don't you take Jack home," my mom suggested, bringing my mind back to the present. "Then we'll get dinner ready and by the time we're done eating, you'll have to go meet Alice."

Alice.

I'll probably need fantasy Edward to get through that, too.

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**A/N:** What are you going to name your first child/What did you name your first child?


	6. Chapter 5

**A/N:** I have no excuse. I just hope that it doesn't take another 4-5 months for the next chapter. Thanks for sticking with me!

I wanted to name my son Jack and my daughter Sarah, but unfortunately my older brother took both those names. *waggles fist*

There's a flashback at the beginning and yes, Alice is here! Perhaps everyone should read the end of the last chapter to see where we left off. Enjoy!

Of course, I do not own the characters.

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Chapter Five

I stood in front of my closet wondering what I should wear. Well, okay, I guess I really wasn't wondering what I should wear, I was procrastinating. I still wasn't sure if I had the courage to meet her. She was my best friend, and the first person who knew I had an unhealthy obsession with Edward…

"_So do you want to come over?" Alice asked me as we walked out of our final class for the day. We were juniors in High School._

_ I hugged my books to my chest. "Umm, will Edward be there?"_

_ She glanced at me. "Well, he is my brother, so yeah, he'll be there." She giggled._

_ I blushed scarlet and she stopped dead in the hallway, her eyes wide. "Bella, do you have a crush on my brother?"_

_ I looked around the hallway to see people were staring. "Jeez, Alice, keep your voice down! I do not have a crush on Edward. He's your twin brother." Liar, liar, pants on fire. I loved everything about Edward. His face, his hair, his smile, his voice, the way his fingers moved across the piano keys. I was so head over heels that I secretly watched him while he played every time I went over to the Cullen's house._

_ We continued walking together. "Besides, Edward's on a completely different level of cool than me," I said. "He's perfect, and I'm just…not." We approached my locker and I put my combination through._

_ Alice was looking at me with a disgusted look on her face. "Edward is not perfect, Bella. Get your heads out of the clouds. You're grossing me out."_

_ I rolled my eyes at her then focused on something over her shoulder._

_ There he was. Edward Cullen. Everything went into slow motion. He had his hands in his pockets and his button up shirt was open giving me a great view of a black t-shirt tight across his perfect chest._

_ And he was walking straight towards us._

_Okay, Bella. Act cool. It's just Alice's brother._

_He looked up from the floor and his gaze fixed onto mine almost immediately. That beautiful crooked smile spread across his lips, and I swear I forgot to breathe. He slid his hand out of his pocket to wave at me._

"_Hi Edward!" An annoying, nasally voice exclaimed._

_Jessica Stanley in her tiny cheerleading uniform had stepped in front of him, making his eyes detach from mine, which then made me snap out of "slow motion Edward" and back to reality. I looked away from them and started putting my books away. Alice rolled her eyes at me then looked at herself in the little mirror I had in my locker._

"_Oh, hey Jessica," I heard him say._

"_There's this big party tonight over at Eric Yorkie's house. His parents are out of town and he's going to have a huge bonfire. It's going to be so fun."_

_He paused. "That's cool."_

"_I know, right? So I was thinking maybe you and I could go together."_

_Alice made gagging sounds and I elbowed her gently._

_Edward blew out some air. "I have a test in Biology on Monday."_

_She guffawed. "So study on Saturday and Sunday. Come on, Eddie."_

_Eddie? Yuck!_

"_Alright, fine, I'll meet you there," he told her after a few beats of silence._

_My heart fell to the floor._

"_Meet me there? I was hoping that you could pick me up," Jessica said, let down._

"_I have a couple things to do today, Jessica. I'm going to have to meet you there."_

_She sighed. "Alright Eddie, see you later."_

_Alice was the first to speak. "Really, Edward? Jessica Stanley? Talk about lowering your standards."_

"_Hello, Bella," Edward said into my ear._

_I spun around, surprised. I hadn't realized he had gotten so close to me._

"_Hi," I replied lamely._

"_Are you going to Eric's party tonight?" His voice was smooth. Confident._

_I tucked a piece of hair behind my ear. "Umm, I really don't think I was invited."_

_He smiled crookedly at me, his green eyes glowing. "Well, I'm inviting you."_

_I blushed – I couldn't help it when he smiled at me like that. "I don't know, Edward. I have a test in Biology on Monday too."_

_He nodded, still smiling. "Fair enough. See you later." He brushed past me and our hands grazed each other, causing a spark between us. He glanced over his shoulder at me and winked._

_I'm pretty sure I needed a fresh pair of underwear._

"_Really, Bella, the least you could do is control the blushing when he comes around," Alice said._

_I covered my face in my hands. "I'm a mess."_

_She rolled her eyes and grabbed my wrist. "Come on, let's get out of here."_

_Alice and Edward lived with their parents Carlisle and Esme in this ridiculously large house in the outskirts of Forks. It took about 20 minutes to get from there to school – twice as long as it took me – so by the time we got home it was almost four in the afternoon. Eric's party started at seven._

"_Do you want to go to Eric's party?" I tentatively asked Alice as we pulled into her garage._

_She chortled. "And watch all the conformist sheep get trashed just so they can throw up and have a 'funny' story to tell on Monday? Get real, Bella." We slid out of the car and she grinned at me. "You just want to stare at Edward all night."_

_I smiled back at her. "Well at least I'd be less obvious about it than Jessica," I said as we walked through the garage door and into the kitchen. "I mean, she basically threw herself at him in the hallway. 'Oh, Eddie! Come to the party with me tonight and let me suck your cock. You're sooo dreamy!"_

_I turned around the corner into the kitchen and froze when I saw Edward leaning against the counter, eating an apple, giving me his biggest smile._

"_Please do, and thanks for the compliment, Bella." He winked._

_Alice busted out laughing._

I smiled at the memory. We definitely didn't reach third base that night, or any night soon after, for that matter. I apologized profusely to him, and after my skin had faded to its natural color instead of tomato red, I became conscious that Alice had surreptitiously left us alone together. And at around nine o'clock, I realized he stood Jessica up just to hang out with me. We had been pretty much inseparable since then.

I focused on the task at hand and settled on skinny jeans and a short sleeved plaid button down shirt.

"You look nice, momma," Jack said as I walked to the kitchen to grab my purse.

Such a charmer.

"Thanks," I said, mussing up his hair. "Don't be up too late, okay? And make sure you go to the bathroom before bed."

My mom was at the door as I slipped on my sandals. "Are you sure you're okay to go there alone?"

"Yes, mother." I'm pretty sure she just wanted to be there to be nosey. "I promise I'll give you an exact word-for-word breakdown when I come home."

"Good luck!" She called as I walked out the door. Starbucks was only It was only a few blocks away, so I decided to walk.

Along the way, I prepared myself for a verbal beating. Alice was vocal when she had an opinion on something, and this was no exception. How would I respond? Would I try to explain myself? Would she even let me explain? Maybe I would just cry and run away. Good God, that'd be pitiful.

I turned the corner, looked up from my shoes, and saw her. We both stopped dead in our tracks and stared at each other.

Besides her long hair, she really hadn't changed. She looked more mature, but still had that gorgeous angelic face with flawless skin. Even though we were meeting at a coffee shop, she still dressed to the nines in true Alice fashion: black heels, black pencil skirt, and white button up blouse. I wondered briefly if she was going out for drinks after this.

We both made a tentative step towards each other. She gave me a small, sheepish smile, and I returned it. It was her. It was really Alice! I knew I should have been careful, but I couldn't help myself. I tossed my nerves to the wind, ran to her, and threw my arms around her.

And to my surprise, she threw her arms around me too.

"I can't believe it's you!" She said as we broke apart, taking each other in. Her voice was still high-pitched and smooth, like the sound twinkling bells being carried in the wind.

"No, _I_ can't believe it's _you_! Who would have thought that you'd make it to Chicago, let alone be my son's teacher?"

Her face darkened slightly as I mentioned Jack and I knew, despite her cheerful attitude, I was still in a lot of trouble. "I know. Let's go inside. We obviously have some catching up to do."

I was suddenly thankful we were meeting in a public place.

We walked through the door and I fished my wallet out of my purse. "Go ahead and find a spot for us to sit, I'll get our drinks," I said, and motioned to two plush burgundy velvet chairs in the corner of the shop.

"Oh, Bella, that's not necessary."

"My treat, Alice, don't worry about it."

"Are you sure? I mean, I was the one who asked you to meet me here."

I laughed. "Asked? More like demanded!"

She grinned. "Even more of a reason that I should pay!"

I rolled my eyes. "Go."

"Thanks, Bella." She told me what she wanted and walked over to the chairs.

As I waited for our beverages to be made, I watched her and marveled at the way she carried herself. Even in high school, Alice had walked with the style and poise of a lithe dancer rather than an awkward teenager, and it seemed to improve with age. She captured the attention of all the patrons in the shop, even for just a second, male and female alike. After she settled in, she reached into her purse, retrieved her cell phone, and by the way her eyes lit up, I knew it was her husband. Well, at least I hoped it was.

Grabbing my caramel frappuccino and Alice's passion fruit iced tea lemonade, I made my way towards her. I was surprised at how I felt. I'd prepared myself to feel uneasy and nervous, but in fact, I was the exact opposite of that. Sure, I was still a little shaky, but when we saw each other and hugged, all my worries about our meeting faded away.

She spotted me approaching. "Alright, I have to go, Jazz. I'll see you in a bit. I love you."

My heart constricted at the word love. I'd never lost my ability to love my family, but the idea of loving another man again was… impossible to imagine.

"Your husband's name is Jazz?" I asked, sitting down and putting our drinks on the mahogany table separating our chairs.

She smiled and giggled, her face glowing. "No, his name is Jasper."

"I can't believe you're married already. When did that happen?"

"Well, we met in college," she started, tossing her ponytail over her shoulder. "I was in a sorority and he was in a fraternity." She must have seen my incredulous look I gave her because she said, "I know, I know. Me? In a sorority? But you know how each sorority has a stereotype? Like, there's the sorority that only bimbos are accepted into, then there's the one that seems to have only bigger girls, one full of asians..." She trailed off because she must have connected the dots that I probably didn't make it to a college campus. "Oh, Bella, um…"

I waived her off. "No, no, go on. I didn't go away to school - I got my associates taking online classes - but I know that there are different sororities. So which one did you join?"

"The most stylish one, of course! Full of intelligent and fashion savvy college women. It was great. But, Bella, I didn't _demand_ you here to talk about me-"

I didn't want to ruin the flow of our easy conversation with a difficult one. "Was that when you decided to grow out your hair? In college?" I asked interrupting her.

That got her side tracked. "Oh, I forgot, the last time you saw me was when I had my butch cut."

I gaped at her. "Alice! It was _not_ a butch cut. It was a cute pixie cut and looked great on you!"

She rolled her eyes and crossed her legs. "Well, thanks, but no, I decided to grow out my hair senior year of high school, right after you left." She paused. "Speaking of when you left-"

Cutting her off again, I asked, "But when you did you and your husband get married?"

Her eyes got a far-away look in them. "This past May."

"Wow! Congratulations!"

"Thank you. Oh, Bella, it was beautiful. The weather was perfect, everything was just right… I would repeat that day in a heartbeat."

She was quiet after that.

I shifted in my seat. "I'm really sorry I wasn't there for any of that, Alice," I said quietly.

Her eyes flashed to mine. "It wasn't just Edward you walked out on."

I looked down, unable to hold her gaze. "I know, I know. I'm sorry."

"Why did you leave, Bella? Did you think that Edward wasn't going to be a good father? Were you ashamed of my family? Did you think of anyone but yourself? Didn't you love Edward? Did-"

"Alice, Alice, calm down," I said, reaching out to gently squeeze her arm.

She exhaled took a tissue out of her purse to dab her eyes that had begun to tear. "I'm sorry. I – _we _ – were just so angry when you left, and now all these questions are resurfacing."

I sipped my drink and cleared my throat. "I don't really have a good reason for leaving," I started. "I mean, when I found out I was pregnant, I was so scared – scared of Charlie, scared that Esme and Carlisle wouldn't approve, scared that Edward would abandon me-"

Her eyebrows furrowed. "How could you even _think_ that of my family?" She asked accusingly.

I felt my anger rise a bit. "As I said, I don't really have a good reason for leaving. No, I didn't think Edward was going to be a bad father, but to be honest, I wasn't really thinking of his parenting skills at the time. As for being ashamed of your family, that situation in my mind was reversed – I was afraid _they _were going to be ashamed of _me._ And of course I love – _loved_ – Edward." (Did I, or rather, _could_ I still love Edward?) "How could you even doubt that? Don't you remember how we acted together? God, we were so blinded by love that we thought the real world wasn't even capable of separating us. How fucking ignorant." I paused to recollect my thoughts and calm myself down. "Yes, I was acting completely selfishly, but Alice, I am not kidding you when I say that I have been in the airport on my way to Forks at least twice until chickening out and coming back home. I wanted to go. I _still_ want to go and clear things up with him, sooner rather than later, especially now that you know."

"Edward's not even-" She started to say, but stopped herself.

I stared at her. "Edward's not even what?"

"Well, Edward's not even in Forks," she continued.

That brought me up short. "Oh." Well, duh. Of course he wouldn't stay cooped up in Forks. Did you think he wasn't going to accomplish his goals without you? Crap, I hadn't even considered the fact that he might be married. Mild panic began to set in. "Where did he go?"

"Bella…" She leaned towards me and took my hands. Yep, he must be married. I shut my eyes and braced myself for the worst.

"Edward moved here last year."

It was like I'd been sucker punched in the stomach. My eyes popped open, my breath whooshed out of me, and I pulled my hands away from hers. "Edward is _here_?"

She nodded.

"Um…_why_?" I asked, exasperated.

"Well, he moved to Seattle to go to college and as he was studying medicine, he decided that he wanted to work with children."

Of course he did. Because he was perfect.

"And, as I'm sure you know, Children's Memorial Hospital in Lincoln Park is one of the best, if not _the_ best, children's hospital in America. You know Edward and I are super close and he and Jazz get along great, so he wanted to move to Chicago to be near us, too. It just made sense for him to come here. He's still finishing up school at Northwestern's medical school."

I was very still, absorbing all of this information. "Does he know I'm here?" My voice was almost a whisper.

She shrugged. "He came here to look for you the summer after you left."

"He did?"

She nodded. "But he didn't have any idea where to begin. He didn't have any of Renee's numbers since she had just moved here when you went to live with her again. And you changed your cell number, and Charlie certainly wasn't going to give him any information. But he doesn't know if you're still here. None of us knew where you were."

I ran my hands over my face and through my hair, exhausted. This conversation was emotionally draining. "Where does he live?"

After studying me for a moment, she extracted a pen from her purse and scribbled down an address down on a napkin.

"He lives in a mid-rise in the Gold Coast." She smiled at me and placed the napkin in my palm. "I always knew you would come back into our lives. Somehow, someway…I just knew."

Unable to respond, I simply stared down at my hands with my destiny written on a Starbucks napkin.

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**A/N**: What do you like to order from your favorite coffee shop?


	7. Chapter 6

**A/N**: Hey, only three months this time. I'm making progress!

A couple things:

1. The lemon in the beginning of this chapter is a flashback. If you don't feel comfortable reading it, please scroll to where the Italics end.

2. I write about something called the "L". For those who don't know, this is what the subway and elevated train system that runs through Chicago is called.

3. I mention a band called Sigur Ros. If you haven't heard of them, check them out. They're from Iceland. My favorite song by them is called "Track 1" (yep, it's literally named Track 1).

4. The lyrics in the beginning of the song are from the song Parachute. I know Cheryl Cole is a big deal over in the U.K. and I just want to note that Ingrid Michaelson wrote the lyrics then gave them to Cheryl for her to sing. Ingrid recently recorded her own version, and it is awesome.

Thank you all again for sticking with me. I think this is the longest chapter yet. Almost 4,800 words. Woohoo!

Of course, I do not own the characters.

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_**Won't tell anybody that you turn the world around, I**_  
_**won't tell anyone that your voice is my favorite sound, I**_  
_**won't tell anybody,**_  
_**won't tell anybody.**_  
_**They want to see us fall,**_  
_**they want to see us fall down.**_

_-Ingrid Michaelson, Parachute**  
**_

Chapter 6

_I was in my room, still damp from a shower, when my phone vibrated on my nightstand. It was a text from Edward._

"_Want to come over?"_

_In those four words I knew what he wanted to do, and a small shiver ran through my body. The timing really couldn't have been better. I knew (and more importantly, _he_ knew) that Alice was spending the night at our friend Jessica's and Edward's parents were away for the weekend._

"_Sure," I responded._

_I was happy, excited, but very nervous, and unfortunately I couldn't talk to my best friend about this, considering Edward was her brother. I had a robe on and a towel in my hair but quickly tore them off and began searching my drawers for my cutest pair of underwear. After settling on a pair of black lace boy shorts, I slid on some jeans, a bra, and threw on a t-shirt. After shoving some things into a backpack and hastily checking my reflection, I went downstairs to tell my father I was spending the night at Alice's._

_The game was on so he was sufficiently distracted. "Okay honey, see you tomorrow," he said. "Wait. Aren't Carlisle and Esme out of town? Where's Edward?"_

_I sighed inwardly, marveling at how much he really did pay attention, even though it didn't seem that way. "Yes, they're out of town, but Edward is at Emmett McCarty's house. Alice doesn't want to be alone. She tends to think every noise that her house makes is a psychotic serial killer trying to break in."_

_He studied me for a moment, obviously taking in my appearance. No make-up, hair a little frizzy and still air drying from my shower, jeans, and a t-shirt. Hardly the look for a girl who knew she was going to lose her virginity. "Alright," he said. "You've got your phone on, right?"_

"_Yes, dad." I walked in the hall and picked up a brown zip-up hoodie I'd hung on the coat rack. "See you tomorrow."_

_I didn't lie entirely. Edward was at Emmett's house – for about an hour earlier in the day._

_The rumbling of my truck alerted Edward of my arrival and I saw him open the door and lean against the jamb. I hopped out of the car and slung my backpack over my shoulder. He smiled his special crooked smile._

"_Hey," I greeted, smiling back at him as I walked up the porch steps._

"_Hi." He reached out, took my face in his hands, and kissed me softly and tenderly._

_What started out as a gentle kiss had ended up hot and deep. I placed my hands on his hard chest then rubbed up to wrap my arms around his neck, sliding my tongue into his mouth. He slid his hands down my body slowly, agonizingly, over my shoulders to the sides of my breasts, his thumbs skimming over my bra, continuing down to my waist and finally to my hips, squeezing them slightly. The kiss left no question in my mind what the purpose of my visit was._

_We parted, panting, the magnetic pull between us impossible to ignore. He took my hand and led me inside, up the stairs, and into his bedroom._

_The room was dark except for candles on Edward's dresser and his desk. Sigur Ros was playing softly on his computer. He watched me as I put my backpack down in the corner of his room._

"_You cleaned," I noted, breaking the silence between us._

_He chuckled and moved towards me. "Yeah, I cleaned. I wanted to impress my girlfriend." He winked._

_My heart fluttered in my chest._

_Edward reached up and tucked my hair behind my ear then bent down and began to kiss my jaw line. His soft lips moved across my jaw to my ear, then down to my neck, sucking gently, tenderly nibbling at my skin._

"_Alice is at Jessica's," he whispered, his breath hot on my neck._

_It took me a moment to find my voice. "I know."_

"_My parents are out of town."_

_I nodded._

_He straightened and looked me in the eyes. "You are my life now. I've never cared for someone else the way I care about you."_

"_You're the best thing that's ever happened to me, Edward."_

_And with that, my fingers found the hem on the bottom of his shirt and I started to pull up._

_His hand clasped around my wrist, stopping me. My eyes flicked up to his._

"_Are you sure you're ready to do this?" He asked._

_I nodded. "I'm sure."_

_He let go of my wrist._

_I pulled his shirt up and over his head, placing soft kisses over his chest as it became exposed. Edward reached down and slipped his hands under my shirt, rubbing my skin up to the sides of my breasts. We watched each other as he hooked his thumbs under my bra and rubbed them over my nipples. He moved his hands to my back and began unlatching the clasp on my bra. I reached down and pulled my shirt off, and then he pushed the straps of my bra off my shoulders, the small piece of clothing falling to the ground. He pulled me against him, chest to chest, skin to skin, and I tilted my head up to meet his lips._

_We stood kissing for what seemed an eternity. Our kisses were slow and languid, deep and passionate. I felt his hands fumbling with the button on my jeans so I reached down to help him, then returned the favor. We each took a step back and pulled our jeans down, stepping out of them, leaving me in my black panties and Edward in his black boxer-briefs._

_He reached to me and hooked a finger in the hem of my undies. "Haven't seen these before," he observed._

_I smiled. "I was saving them for a special occasion."_

_That crooked smile came back. "So you knew what was going to happen tonight?"_

"_Without a doubt."_

_He squatted down in front of me and pulled my panties down. I played with his hair – it was so hard not to – and he began kissing my inner thighs, making his way up to that perfect spot. He kissed me there, flicking his tongue out as well, causing me to tremble. He moved his mouth up my body, nibbling a bit, first to my left hip, then up my belly, moving over to my right breast. He took my nipple in his mouth and my head fell back, a moan escaping from my mouth._

"_I love when you make little noises like that," he commented._

_I groaned, his mouth still doing wonders on me. "I love when you _make_ me make noises like that."_

_He chuckled then straightened, once again covering my lips with his._

_I felt his arousal against my belly and I reached down to palm him through his boxers. I heard his intake of breath. Mimicking his moves, I too got down in front of him, sliding his boxers down, releasing him from the confines of the fabric. Looking up at him from under the fringe of my lashes, I wrapped my hand around him and leaned forward to take a lick._

"_Bella," he breathed._

_I smiled up at him._

"_I want you," he said. "I need you."_

_He took my hand and pulled me up and moved to his bed. His lips took mine, and he slowly guided my back onto his mattress. He moved on top of me, covered us with his white sheets, and then placed his hands on either side of my shoulders, his green eyes looking directly into mine. Edward's hair had become messier than usual and was hanging down over his forehead._

_ I smiled and lifted my hand to sweep his hair to the side._

_ He closed his eyes and leaned his head into my hand._

_ I moved my hand to the back of his head and then trailed my fingernails soothingly up and down his back._

_ "You're sure you're ready?" He whispered, his gorgeous eyes looking down at me again, his face full of excitement, worry, and lust._

_ I only nodded in response and watched as he reached over me to his nightstand to grab a condom. He tore the package open, removed the latex, and then slid it on._

_ I closed my eyes. The bed squeaked a bit as Edward moved slightly and I felt the gooeyness of the condom press lightly against me. Then he paused. "Bella, please tell me if I'm hurting you too much."_

_ My eyes opened and I looked up at him. "I love you, Edward."_

_ He gave me a crooked smile. "I love you, too."_

_ We stared at each other, our breathing steady, our bodies buzzing by the fact that this was finally happening. His pushed his tip inside of me and I instinctually flinched._

_ He paused, again. "Do you want me to stop?" He asked breathlessly._

_ "No, please don't. Stop worrying so much, Edward. Just go slow."_

_ He continued to slide inside of me unhurried and smoothly, and then he groaned._

_ I clenched my eyes shut and focused on breathing evenly. The pain wasn't horrible, but it wasn't pleasant._

_ I felt his forehead rest on top of mine and he let out a low oath. "You feel so good. It's very distracting that I know you aren't feeling as good as me right now," he said._

_ I wrapped my arms around his neck. "Just stay like this for a minute."_

_ His breathing was ragged and hot against my face. After the initial pain faded, I tilted my head up and kissed him on his perfect lips. He knew this was his cue, and I felt him begin to thrust back then forth, slowly and softly._

_ "Bella," he whispered. My name rolled off of his tongue so beautifully. Keeping his slow pace, he dipped his head down to my ear. "I love you," he told me again, then kissed and nibbled on my earlobe._

_ "You can go a little faster now," I whispered back._

_ I heard his breathing hitch then felt him move a bit faster. He kissed my neck, sucking and biting on it softly, making me moan. He knew the spots on my body that drove me crazy._

_ "Look at me," he ordered, his voice soft._

_ My eyes popped open and I met his unwavering gaze._

_ He slowed his hips and put his hand to my cheek. "You are so beautiful," he told me, then leaned down to kiss me. I felt his tongue slide across my lips, and my mouth opened in response. Our tongues touched lightly, lazily moving against each other. We stopped kissing and he continued his faster pace, groaning quietly whenever his pelvis met mine._

_ I reached up and ran my hand through his hair, weaving my fingers into it. Encased in his soft white sheets, it was as if it was just the two of us in the sleepy town of Forks. I was so focused on him; the way our eyes were locked, the expressions on his face whenever he entered me fully, his perfect body on top of mine, the feeling of him moving inside me. Giving myself completely to the one person I'd ever fallen in love with was exhilarating._

_ His breaths began to come in short little huffs and I knew he was close. "You feel incredible, Bella. I'm really close, do you mind…?"_

_ "Don't worry about me tonight," I said, knowing he was asking if I cared that he came before me. Edward was an unselfish lover, always making sure I reached my peak before him whenever we fooled around._

_ At this, he sped up a little bit. His cheeks were flushed, his lips were parted, and his eyes clouded with lust began to lose focus. This was the beginning of Edwards "O" face. He closed his eyes and began to moan softly at first, then a bit louder._

_ "Oh, God," he managed to groan out, and I pulled him down to me, his head nestled in the crook of my neck. He used my shoulder to muffle his moans as his hips moved faster. As his pelvis met mine one last time, his body went rigid. I felt his warm release fill the condom inside me. After he was finished, his body relaxed, and we laid like that for a bit as we waited for our breaths to even out, our heartbeats to slow. He kissed my shoulder and my neck softly, and I ran my fingertips up and down his back._

My alarm woke me up at 9:00am. It was set for the radio to turn on, and Katy Perry's "Teenage Dream" was playing.

How fitting.

"Ugh," I groaned, feeling my hair sticking to the back of my neck with sweat.

I hadn't had a dream about Edward's and my first time in quite a while. And as far as first time's go, mine was pretty incredible.

I took a deep breath and sat up, glancing around my room. The sun was streaming through the windows and I could hear the birds chirping outside. It seemed like it was going to be a good day.

Except that it was Saturday, and I'd told myself all week that I'd go to Edward's apartment on Saturday.

Alice and I had exchanged numbers, and I began to count on her to text me every day to push me to see Edward. "Three more days," she'd say. "This is the right decision."

I knew it was, but it certainly didn't make it any easier.

I slipped out of bed and padded to my bathroom, thinking a cold shower was in order after my hot dream last night. When I met with Edward, I had to be completely focused, not flustered and thinking of him and I together.

_He's a man now, Bella. Probably a very sexy man,_ my head told me.

_Stop it!_ I ordered myself.

Yes, a cold shower was definitely required.

After putting on some light make up (blush, mascara, and Chap Stick), I decided to do something with my hair. Factoring in the humidity, I figured putting some light gel in my hair and scrunching it was the way to go. I dressed in dark wash skinny jeans cuffed at the hem, cute yellow flats, and a grey t-shirt. Grabbing my purse off of my bedroom floor, I headed through the hallway and into the kitchen.

It was quiet, and I saw a note on the counter.

"Went to Ann Sather's," it read. "Jack wanted cinnamon rolls, and I figured you needed some time to yourself. Love, mom."

I tossed the note back on the counter and went to the fridge, taking out milk and orange juice. I poured some cereal into a bowl, orange juice in a glass, then leaned against the counter, staring off into space, thinking about just what the hell I was about to do.

I still had absolutely no idea what to say to him. _Hey Edward! Long time no see. You look great. Oh, and by the way, you have a son._

I asked both my mom and Alice for advice, but they both had said the same thing.

"It'll come to you."

Some help that was.

Seriously, I was going to walk up to his door step on a peaceful Saturday and drop this huge bomb shell. But how? Maybe I'd get lucky and he wouldn't be home. Guess I'd have to wait another week… too bad…

_Bad attitude, Bella. Just get this over with._

I was so busy mentally berating myself that I nearly dropped my bowl of cereal when my phone started ringing. I reached into my purse and read the screen. It was Angela.

"Hello?" I answered, shoving a mouthful of Cheerio's to the side of my mouth.

"Hi Bella! What are you up to?"

I shoved some cereal around my bowl. "Just eating breakfast, about to head out. What's up?"

"Oh, sorry to interrupt. I was just wondering if you wanted to bring Jack and meet me at the park."

"Hmm, tempting offer. I bet it's gorgeous outside."

"Yeah, it is."

"I can't though. I've got this…thing I have to do today."

"No worries, maybe tomorrow."

"Yeah."

"Alright, have fun!"

"Angela, wait."

She paused. "Yeah?"

I put my bowl in the sink, rinsed it. "I need your help on something."

"Sure."

"Jack doesn't know his father."

"I know," she said, her voice changing from light to serious.

"I'm actually going to his father's apartment today to tell him he has a son."

She was quiet.

"Are you still there?" I asked.

"Yeah," she responded, exhaling. "Wow, that's…a big deal."

I nodded. "Tell me about it. I was just wondering if you had any advice or maybe some words of encouragement."

"Hmm," she murmured. "I don't know, Bella, maybe you shouldn't tell him right away."

I swallowed a gulp of orange juice. "What do you mean?"

"Perhaps you should go over there and let him know you're in the area. I mean, you haven't spoken to this guy in years, right?"

"Right."

"I think you should go over there, say hello, and maybe meet somewhere for coffee. And this may be hard to hear, but he could have a live-in girlfriend who probably wouldn't be too thrilled with your impromptu visit."

"I don't give a fuck about his girlfriend," I caught myself saying. I clapped a hand over my mouth, surprised at the resentment that flashed through me.

"Bella…"

I shook my head, willing the anger out of my body. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I get what you're saying. This is a huge deal and I need to assess his situation first before I drop this on him."

"Exactly. He was important to you, right?"

I paused. "Extremely," I said softly.

"I'm sure he felt the same way about you. You arriving at his door will be shocking enough."

This plan made me feel a lot better about my impending visit. "Thank you so much, Angela."

"I'm here anytime. Let me know if you want to meet up tomorrow."

"Will do. You're awesome."

"You too. Good luck. Bye."

I slipped my phone back in my purse then chugged the rest of my orange juice. I set my glass in the sink, grabbed my purse, and then headed out the door. I jingled my car keys in my hand, wondering what parking would be like around his building. Then I tried to think of which L station was closest to his place, and came up empty. Shoving my keys back in my purse, I walked down my quiet street a couple blocks then turned right, going towards the nearest busy intersection to look for a cab. I put my hand up, and a cab came screeching to a halt right in front of me.

I focused on breathing evenly on the way over. My stomach was in knots, and I wondered briefly if I really should have taken the L. The cab was moving at a rapid pace, taking sharp turns, coming to sudden stops. The L would have been slower, giving me more time to prepare, and was definitely cheaper, but I quickly pushed that thought out of my head. I'd had all week to prepare. It was time.

"$8.35," the cabby informed me.

I gave him a ten dollar bill and told him to keep the change.

He sped off leaving me standing in front of Edward's building. Lifting a hand to my brow to block out the sun, I tipped my head back to take a look. It was a newer building in the Gold Coast, seemed to be made of only windows, and it looked to be about twenty-five floors. I reached in my bag and dug out the crumpled napkin that had his address written on it and saw he lived in apartment number 1209.

_Now or never_, I told myself.

Taking a breath, I pushed through the revolving door and into the cool lobby, my steps echoing throughout the atrium. I walked to the elevators, pushed "Up", then waited. I checked my reflection in the shiny elevator doors, fixing my hair, straightening out my shirt. The doors dinged and opened, and I stepped inside and selected floor twelve.

My heart was fluttering in my chest and my palms were sweating. I rubbed them nervously on my jeans, then I stepped out when the doors opened. The hallway was quiet. His unit was at the end of the hall.

I stood in front of his door staring at the peep hole with my fist raised, waiting for my brain to make it knock.

_You can do this, you can do this._

Closing my eyes and holding my breath, I gave the door three quick raps.

I didn't hear anything at first. No footsteps, no one calling, "Come in!"

But then I did.

The unmistakable giggling of a female. My stomach dropped, my heart stuttered, and then it sank to my knees.

_Flee!_ my mind was telling me, but my feet refused to budge.

I heard the padding of quick footsteps coming to the door and just as I regained control over my legs, the door opened, and I saw the most beautiful woman I'd ever seen. The kind of beautiful that made every woman around her think, "I should have gone to the gym today." Or, "I shouldn't have had that extra scoop of ice cream last night." My self-esteem took a direct hit. Her hair was blonde, perfectly curled, and tumbled romantically over her shoulders. Her eyes were blue, like violets, and her face was angelic. She was bare foot, and wearing only a man's button down shirt.

"Can I help you?" She asked, her eyes scanning me, looking confused.

It took a moment for me to find my voice. I cleared my throat. "I'm, uh, looking for Edward. Edward Cullen."

Her eyes were guarded. "He's not here right now."

_Get out of here,_ my brain warned. "Okay, thanks." I turned on my heel and took one step when I heard a male voice ask, "Babe, who's here?"

I stopped and turned back to the door slowly, where I met the dark brown eyes of none other than Emmett McCarty.

"Holy shit," we both exclaimed.

"Emmett!"

He gave me a big smile and came forward to lift me into a bear hug, which was when I noticed he was only wearing sweatpants. "Isabella 'Just Bella' Swan? Oh my God, this is crazy! What are you doing here?"

I faltered a bit, getting my response in order. "I live in Lincoln Park and ran into Alice and she told me Edward lived here now too. She failed to mention you lived with him." He set me down and I took a generous step back, aware of the daggers the blonde was giving me.

"Yeah, I'm in between places right now."

I nodded and shoved my hands in my pockets.

Blondie cleared her throat.

"Oh, sorry, babe. Bella, this is Rosalie, my leading lady," he said, wrapping his arm around her shoulders and giving her a squeeze. "Bella went to High School with Edward, Alice, and I," he explained to her.

I gave her a small smile. "It's nice to meet you, Rosalie."

"Charmed," she said, though she certainly didn't seem so.

He rolled his eyes dramatically in her direction.

I fiddled with the hem of my t-shirt, clearly out of my element. "So, ah, Edward isn't here?"

"He's out with Sasha. Not sure when he'll be back," Rosalie told me in a clipped tone.

"Oh," I said as my heart sank. _Sasha_. Sounded skanky.

Emmett grinned at me. "His dog."

My brows lifted. "Oh," I asked, my voice immediately becoming light.

Rosalie rolled her eyes and went back inside the apartment.

Waving a hand in her direction, he said, "Don't worry about her. She's just worried about Edward."

"So she, um, knows about me?"

Emmett paused then nodded slowly. "Yeah. Edward's mentioned your name once or twice."

I nodded too, then looked down and shuffled my feet, the weight on my chest feeling even heavier.

"Bella," he started. I peaked up and saw his eyes were serious. "Edward is going to flip out when he finds out that you're here."

"I know, I pretty much flipped out when I found out Alice was teaching at the elementary school in Lincoln Park."

He studied me for a moment, perhaps wondering how I knew she taught there, but thinking better of asking the question. "Well, Eddie doesn't usually do much on Sunday's. If you came by the same time tomorrow, I'm sure he'd be here."

"Alright, sounds good. Thanks Emmett."

"Do you want me to tell him you came by?"

"Um, no, that's okay. I'll come by tomorrow."

He smiled at me. "I hope you do. Edward will appreciate that." He stepped forward and wrapped his arms around me. "Bye, Bells."

I rubbed his back. "Bye, Emmett." I wasn't sure why it felt like I was saying goodbye to him forever. Maybe it was because I'd never given him a proper goodbye before. I turned back towards the elevators and pressed down, giving Emmett a small wave as he watched me step into the double doors.

When the doors closed and I let out a huge gust of air and leaned against the wall. I didn't want to do this all over tomorrow. I didn't think my nerves could handle it. Seeing Emmett was great, but awkward. I knew that he knew there was a reason behind my random visit, but Emmett wasn't the type to speculate and mull things over. Well, at least, that's how he was when I knew him.

That last little thought caused a pang in my chest. _When I knew him._ I really didn't know these people anymore.

I walked out of the elevator and that's when I heard _him_.

"Hold on, Sash," he said quietly.

I froze, and just by those three words I remembered every distinct sound of his voice: his bright laugh, the tone he used when he was angry with me, the way my name fell off his tongue when we were intimate, the way he whispered in my ear, how he talked to me when he comforted me, when he teased me. Oh, God. That smooth, velvety voice literally made me ache. My dreams hadn't done it justice.

"Shit," he said. "Sasha, get back here!"

The jingle of the dog's tags echoed loudly in the foyer and her nails were pitter-pattering on the floor, coming fast. Just as I was about to move, the dog bounded around the corner and let out a big _Woof!,_ then bounded into me.

I let out a yelp and started to fall backwards, my arms swinging to try to regain my balance. Sensing how that was a lost cause, I turned my body slightly to brace my fall with my hands, and so I could hide my face from Edward.

The dog was walking happy circles around me, her tongue lolling out her mouth, her eyes bright. She obviously had an energizing walk.

He was letting out a string of profanities as he approached.

"Sasha, back off! I'm so sorry, ma'am. My dog can get sort of crazy."

Still so proper, despite the words that had come out of his mouth seconds before. "It's fine," I mumbled, lamely trying to disguise my voice.

He knelt next to me and grabbed my elbow, but pulled away immediately. I knew what he felt – that same buzzing, but soothing, current that ran through our bodies whenever we were near each other.

I heard him chuckle nervously as he reached for me again, helping me sit up a bit. "Ah, are you okay? I'm really so-"

I pushed my hair away from my face and turned my head towards him.

Our eyes locked and a thousand memories flew through my head. The first time I saw him at school, getting slushies at 7-11 with Alice and Emmett, him helping me with math while I helped with English, the magnetic pull between us that was still present now, how nervous he was when he gave me a rose to apologize after a stupid fight we had, our first kiss, long hikes to our meadow on the weekends, the night we made love under the stars…

He pulled his hand away from me again, though this time not from our spark, but from complete shock.

I took a breath to compose myself and offered a timid smile. "Hello, Edward."

* * *

**A/N**: Do you have any pets?


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